Whine- ter is coming !!!

Whine-ter is coming !!!

The one thing that I like about Delhi is the winter season here ! The smell of Aromatic kebabs cooked in alfresco barbecues and heated verandahs and mulled wine and perhaps the occasional Toddy ! It’s almost perfect .  

However , all good things come to an end and while I’m totally ecstatic to step out to relish the winters and I was hoping the low temperature shall murder this virus for good , I’m still very uncomfortable as I’m disdainful !! Its been so long we’ve socialised and now It’s somewhat  like re cracking the whole virginity experience , filled with awkward moments : ill timed air kisses , undefined boundaries with an Ex flame , having your first night (out ),  but with the wrong heels or the wrong friend ! Ideally getting in the right position , for an Instagram story. Using protection, such as Gucci scarves , Coz it’s safe to wear old season stuff now that Gucci’s announced it’s going season free ! ( who am I kidding Noone here knew the difference anyway) . Overall , It’s quite unnerving !

However what’s even more worrisome ,the one thing I’m still horrified since previous Delhi winters , is to see those girls coming out in their hideous discounted outlet store quilted Burberry jackets in beige brown and black !!! Moreover, they’ll fold the cuff at the sleeve to reveal the now ancient Burberry check pattern ! Of Course like any good wine pairing NOT, aka butter chicken with a pinot Grigio or chugging a chianti Classico with sweet potato fries maybe , they’ve ruined this look too. They’re further murdered it by twinning with their husbands’ same Burberry check shirt paired with an even more atrocious sleeveless puffer jacket ! They call it twinning , I call it “desperate fashion victims with peanut sized dormant and futile cerebrums“! ( I also hate on couples twinning in Balmain T-shirt’s in summers ) 

Now I dont Care if u travelled an hour by bus to fish it out of the clearance racks at Bicester village or you picked it up from the Khan market footpath in 2016 , please don’t wear them anymore !!!! 

If you didn’t get the memo , let me explain you that Richardo Tisci ( pronounced not like Tisca Chopra but more like teeshi sort of rhyming with takeshis castle ) is the new creative director and has come up with a new monogram for the brand ! Kindly level up !

Concurrently , I also pity the Rajouri Garden shops who’ve overstocked their inventories for the fakes of the Burberry checks , yet I fiercely pity the ones who still plan on wearing it this winter all the more ! (if we all step out that is ) 

Since everything is based on a bleak probability of a magical drug that’ll wipe the virus out this winter , i think we can push the barrier just enough to realise that it will only take an even larger miracle , of elephantine proportions , to save these fashionably damned n doomed lot !!! 

In addition, a mere monotony now are the entry level Chanel bags these chicks are carrying. Did nobody tell you chanel is a lifestyle and PS also makes other products , like every god forsaken silhouette in fashion !!!!!! And if you’ve committed the common mistake of picking up one lame bag with all your yearly savings or your husbands OR daddy’s money , then the least you can do is not create a fuss about it or have a “holier than thou” attitude. Like really , just keep it to yourself instead of placing it on the restaurant dinner table, like it’s the centre piece or a freaking Lalique Vase !! Just hang it on those fatty shoulders or the back of your dining chair and give me a break !! Everyone has the capacity to spend 3500€ (after VAT refunds ) in Delhi so kindly RELAX !!

Much like the virus and the state of affairs in this country ,the whole Gucci scarf with Burberry jacket with a chanel bag look paired with uggs , is like an deadly but inedible cocktail made with equal parts of disgust and horror and garnished with frumpy distaste and screaming for attention and or validation.  ..but that’s a debate for another day ! 

For now I just wouldn’t mind sitting back with a decent overpriced cocktail ,in a pretentious outdoor restaurant in my A Non Logo designer Jacket and watch and judge and whine about the live shit show of showoffs and bigots simultaneously witnessing the vile desperation of these wannnbe socialites in a safe public setting !! And whilst i hope for this dreamy surreal, bitchy night out that I may or may not get to go to , meanwhile atleast, We can sit home feel wholesome and give a tight hug to the entry level Boy Chanel , if not a real boy !!! 

XX 

NT